SCANDAL!

I had the boys from work over to my house this past Saturday for a little night of gaming. A couple of us all own EA Sports' Fight Night Round 2, and we had all been talking shit to each other about how so-and-so was going to beat so-and-so. Well, Saturday night came around and it was time to settle all the grudge matches. The main one that was brewing was between myself and my friend Jason. He and his wife (sorry Christy; I swear they'll be more girls here next time so you won't be bored) showed up about midway through the night and it was time to fight. Up until Jason had arrived, we had already had a pretty fun time fighting each other in Soulcalibur II and then we had decided to start Fight Night. I had already decimated most of my opponents in Fight Night until the time Jason arrived; in fact, so complete was the destruction of my opponents that they usually resorted to DQ'ing themselves in the fight to avoid any more public humiliation.

But now Jason was here. It was time to prove who is the best. At first, Jason was having trouble fighting me like all the rest. In his defense, he was using a pre-made character versus my created character who I had built up through the career mode. Translation: my character is stronger overall than the one he was using. Also, he was playing on the opposite side from what he is used to. For those of you who might not understand this, in Fight Night (and in some other games) the first player is always oriented on the left-side of the screen no matter how much you move the character around. So, some people get used to this and have trouble when they have to play the second-player side which would always be oriented on the right. So being the benevolent gaming god that I am, I offered Jason a chance at redemption by allowing him to choose a more even character and letting him play as the first-player. Now, you would think that my benevolence would be rewarded with a good, clean fight. Nay, good sir/madam. You would be wrong!

Somehow, Jason paid off the virtual referee! We were in the middle of a classic heavyweight fight, going 10 rounds strong! I will easily admit that Jason was hurting me with brutal haymakers, but I was landing a lot more shots on Jason each round. Though mine were weaker, the fact that I was hitting a larger percentage and amount of hits was winning me rounds with the judges. Then sometime in the middle of the 10th round, the ref stops the fight! WTF?!? What gives you the audacity to stop this match?! Bah, so what if I can't see out of one eye? I still have one good eye! And I was winning on two of the three judges cards, and was set to win by decision after the 12th round! This treasonous attempt to usurp my throne by Jason will not go unchallenged! I was never knocked out, and I will never acknowledge any win that Jason might claim he has! He paid off the ref to save him, because he knew he was never going to win this fight!